It’s you, you’re missing.

What I’ve noticed lately in the “top posts” section is that there are a lot of people google-ing the following:

Something’s missing but I don’t know what it is.

I even wrote a post about it not long ago, but at the time I didn’t really have any answers. It dawned on me a few days ago that the feeling creeps into your heart when you’ve abandoned yourself.

How do you abandon yourself? By taking more interest in other people’s lives/opinion/choices than your own. When you are there for everyone else and forget your own needs. When you get busy and run around chasing goals and deadlines that have no real meaning except as a distraction from being present to yourself. When you try to escape yourself by watching hours of TV (other people’s lives again) or over-eat/drink/shop etc.

So, right now, take a breath and ask yourself the question: Where am I? Notice where your focus and thoughts are.

Chances are you’ll be far away.

Come back to yourself.

It’s you, you’re missing.

[How I came to “like” my post – it was an accident really; it was simply a matter of wondering what the “like” button does.Β  So, although I don’t dislike this post, I’m probably not quite as enamoured of it might seem. :-)]



Filed under authors, blogging, books, fiction, I should be editing right now, pain, philosophy, writers, Writing

39 responses to “It’s you, you’re missing.

  1. Well-said!

    Reminded me of Eckhart Tolle’s book I’ve been reading: POWER OF NOW.

    I feel close to myself these days. More so than ever. It feels like I am living my purpose–close to writing and reading and literature. It is perfect bliss when you are close to yourself–everyone must try this, and stay there.

    Thanks for the lovely share,

  2. Gillian

    Right now I’m where I want to be, doing the things that make me happy.
    We should not feel guilty for taking care of ourselves, unfortunately we often do and put our needs behind those of family and friends to our own detriment.
    I’ll shut up now, you said it much better.
    Take care, Gillian

  3. Sharmon Gazaway

    Your title was spot on. I long for the days when I was a kid and would lay for hours on my back in a hay field and watch clouds and think I have no idea what about. Sometimes I try to recapture it (I’m one of those people who always stops to smell the roses πŸ™‚ ) but life is so full and chaotic and intrudes into my reverie.
    But yeah, it’s me I’m missing sometimes. I realized a long time ago I need copious amounts of time alone. I can get pretty nasty when I don’t get it, too.
    Nice insight.

  4. Yes, yes, yes. comeing back to ourselves isn’t just for ourselves though, it makes us better able to really be with others.

    I come back to myself in those moments when I’m waiting for something to load on my brouser. It works really well.

    Then there’s walking, doing dished, cleaning – yep, all times when I can turn off my thinking mind and just be, me, in the moment.

    In Lethal Inheritance, this is vital for my heroine. How can you defeat a demon who feeds on fear if you’re totally lost in it?

    • TaliaN, you’re right; being present to ourselves benefits others too.
      And what a good question to pose for your protagonist. “How can you defeat a demon who feeds on fear if you’re totally lost in it?”
      Sounds like a difficult foe to overcome.

  5. Wow, I’d never thought about it this way, Lisa! Food for thought — thanks!

  6. Lisa, beautiful wisdom. It is so very true…people are missing themselves. But they look absolutely everywhere but themselves to find the answers.

  7. This is so beautiful… I think you’re right, and that this is something we need to think about more. Seriously, very very beautiful post, and it really was such a good thing for me to read right now.

  8. This, my dear, is purely perfect.
    Belatedly, it’s just dawned on me that you are more than just an author (and mother) that you are a spiritual Goddess/leader/guru – so thanx for all your wisdom and words that help us folk get through another week/day/hour and back into alignment.

  9. I LOVED THIS, Lisa!

    You’re post made me think… You’re right, every time I have thought something is missing, it’s because I’m not attending to some essential part of myself. When I am not trying to balance every aspect of my life. I always feel like I’m missing a bit a romance in my life, and that’s because I am totally ignoring it. Eh, hence my current goals to address relationships, career, and my physical well being this year. These parts of me are missing, and I’m looking to fill those wholes.

    “It’s you, you’re missing.”

    Absolutely brilliant! Thank you for this πŸ™‚

    • Hi Ollin, yes I enjoyed reading about your balancing act with these areas of your life recently. I’m impressed with your insights and the action you’re taking in order to bring that balance and harmony into your heart and life.
      We’re getting there, I think…

  10. Ahh, the present moment. Thank you for bringing me back to it.

  11. I think the universe is telling me something. But I’m afraid I will ignore it again as I did over the years.

    I just read Ollin’s blog post about passion and now here. A wonderful coincidence!

    Thanks Lisa, I loved this post.

    p.s – I love the fonts on this blog and while I type my comment.

    • Fortunately the universe is patient with us and if we ignore a message the first time we get to hear it over and over.
      Ollin’s blog is a source of inspiration for me too.
      Glad you like the fonts. No credit due to me for that. :-]

  12. BTW lol on the clicking “like” . Sometimes “oops” is nice and brings a smile.

  13. junebugger

    Thanks for this post. I think my issue is trying to please everyone, and as I struggle to do this, I forget who I am, that I have my own needs, and that not everyone can be pleased. So I’ll now take this time to take in a deep breath and remind myself who I am.

  14. It is so easy to get pulled into caring for everyone but us. Thanks for the reminder.

    P.S. I also have a post of my own that I ‘liked’ because I didn’t know what the button did. I couldn’t figure out how to ‘unlike’ it, so views may think I’m conceited πŸ™‚

  15. That’s a strange phrase that’s being googled/searched for. Are people really that lost? It makes me want to give the world a hug, some pie and ice cream. πŸ™‚

  16. Hi…i’m back after a little problem with my blog. Great post by the way!

  17. Ha, I’ve hit the “Like” button on my own blog before because I thought it would show me who liked it first πŸ™‚

    Great post, and the truth of it is largely why I’ve fallen out of my blogosphere tree to an extent (so my apologies I’ve been M.I.A.). With waves of visitors coming back to our wee abode this fall (28 different people have stayed at what I’ve come to call the B&B, a.k.a., my flat, in just a year and a half!), it’s just compounded how much I’ve had to tend to others an immense amount in both the physical and cyber worlds. So the days I have in between guests I’ve predominantly devoted to throwing myself back into ME—reading the books I want to, finishing writing the one that I want to (which I have, pending further inevitable revisions), and just getting out and living the life I want to, and I feel so much more whole and at peace as a result. Thanks for the reflection and insights!

    • My jaw dropped when I read how many people you have been entertaining lately. Wow, you need “you time” for survival purposes. Glad to hear you’re honouring yourself with that.

      • Oh, it gets better. #28 (+1 repeat guest here for the 3rd time) just left last Tuesday. #29 & 30 are arriving this Wednesday. Then my parents arrive Thursday (this is their 2nd visit, so do not add more to the Total Different People count). Yes, that’s right; we managed to F-ing double-book ourselves…just to exemplify how stellar communication is in my household :).

        After London, we will need to move somewhere far less enticing.

      • This is simply proof of how lovely you are! πŸ˜‰

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